I’m becoming more aware each day that I’m on the edge of a new beginning. Having been here before, it’s interesting to see that the process doesn’t change.
I’m still chomping at the bit, waiting for my future to be revealed. I know I need to be patient and learn to go with the flow.
I just hadn’t appreciated how hard that might be!
Two weeks into my new chapter, I am still working. I’ve never found it easy to relax but now I have the freedom I really craved, I’m reverting to a timetable that I’ve adopted for the past 30 or so years. If I’m sat in my study in front of my computer, it feels as if I’m doing something worthwhile! I’ve yet to give myself permission to do other things.
Sit all afternoon reading? Potter about in the garden? Visit somewhere new?
Someone shared a similar experience with me yesterday and said that leaving their dayjob and adopting a different pace of life had been a culture shock! It had taken time to make that transition. It definitely is a shock to the system and my brain has yet to make sense of it.
I’m in a twilight zone between what I’ve just left behind and what might come next. I don’t know what that will be. But I wish it would hurry up!!
I tell others that this period of being in the void is designed to allow us to heal, to regroup, replenish our energy, rest and relax, and release the old to make room for the new.
I’ve started decluttering in earnest. I’ve almost finished purging my study. I’ve been shredding paperwork associated with my previous work, being ruthless in clearing out anything that I really don’t need or want any more. I feel a deep drive to make space both around me and to create room for something new.
There is a distinct letting go taking place.
Not just of old paperwork but also an old chapter in my life. Much as I want to hold on to all my memories of my Mum and Dad, I need to turn the page and start a life of my own without them. It’s a funny old process and, over the past few years, I’ve been gradually releasing a variety of things associated with my parents. Now I feel I want to do a definitive letting go. Of course, I won’t be clearing out everything but it’s time to bottom out the stuff I really no longer have to keep.
I’ve been continuing the process online too. I’ve just refreshed my LinkedIn account. It felt good to disconnect from some contacts – many of whom I don’t actually know or remember where we connected – and also to pave the way for a new business beginning. I did the same to my Facebook account some time ago.
I’m contemplating rearranging furniture.
Logically, my head knows that this process will take time. Emotionally, I’m finding it hard to relax and be patient. I’m finding it very interesting observing it all!