Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
Someone told me recently that I would need to have patience as I wait for my future to unfold. Already, just a couple of weeks into my new beginning, I’m chomping at the bit for that future to make itself known. My personal calendar looks like a patchwork quilt of appointments, to do lists, activities and plans. I suspect I’m going to have to rethink the whole concept of busy!
After working for pretty much all my adult life, I struggle to relax. Whenever I have free time I try to fill it. I’m a constant list maker. I love to plan (the next month’s menus and cleaning schedule are all detailed on the aforementioned calendar!). I really don’t know what to do with myself when I have nothing to do.
But, in keeping with adopting a slower pace of life, things are going to need to change.
I feel as though I have an internal engine that is trying to work at 70 mph. I want to work through each room of the house, driven by a need to declutter and make room for the new, only I want to have it all done by yesterday. I want to spend my days building my website, creating content, updating my social media, gardening, reorganising the greenhouse, doing some baking, going out with my camera, doing yoga, walking, clearing my email backlog. But can it be finished by the end of today?
I’m learning that slow living is hard work. We are all pre-programmed to cram as much as we can into our day. Not to do so makes us feel idle. We’re accustomed to the kudos of being busy, having a jam packed diary, of surviving on a few hours sleep a night before starting again in the morning.
This is what I wanted to get away from but I find that I’m simply perpetuating what went before.
The trick now is to find a way to slow down. I suspect it’s linked with the decluttering, clearing and letting go, making mental and physical space. And, too, getting back on top of the things that have been neglected – like that pile of ironing that never seems to diminish, the emails that don’t quite all get answered, the paperwork to be actioned, phone calls to book appointments.
But this is the journey. The journey back to life and living instead of life and working.